Adieü Adieù Adieu... Remêmber Më

the day started with a tinge of melanchOly. been a year since the passing Of a great mentOr. had initially LöS+ track Of time till the cOming acrOss Of the Obituary sectiOn in the papers...

she had her Own way Of inspiring her students. brOught me up frOm the dumps tO nearly tOpping the cOhOrt fOr prelim's Lit essays. never gOtten the chance tO thank her fOr that. being a devOut muslim, i guess ms. ham shOuld be at peace in her spiritual mecca, sOmewhere up there. i dO miss her at times. she's made an impact with her quirky-fragile self, radiant smile, & her belief in me. thOugh the blOOm ended prematurely, i'm sure she still lives On in the hearts Of many.

Thank yOu Ms. Ham...

Updåte

saturday: had the privilege to meet up with a cOuple Of friends. saturday night fever? hardly. it was kind Of an imprOmptu thingy. yOu knOw? yeah. thOse kind. dinner in the cOmpany Of a babe. always a babe in my eyes. glad tO have taken the initiative in cOntacting her. it's been a while since we had a prOper cOnversatiOn. tO think that the day started Out with a fOul mOOd. the kind which yOu wOuld wish yOu hadn't crOssed my path. yeah. it's easy tO put the blame On PMS. hOw cOnvenient. it can be part Of the trigger, cOmpiled with many Other factOrs which i dOn't have the energy, nOr mOOd tO discuss at length here-and-nOw.

since Our crazy days in green, we hadn't had many OppOrtunities tO gO wild... Only On the infrequent (yOu-can-cOunt-with-yOur fingers) clubbing sessiOns. we had lOads Of fun. memOrable times. which sOmetimes i just wish wOuld never end. many tOpics came up that night. thOughts shared. didn't bitch. girly stuff. superb. i guess sOmetimes it really dOesn't matter hOw Often yOu meet up. Our friendship has stOOd the test Of time. at the end Of the day we knOw we can still have fabulOus times tOgether.

chilled with sOme Other peOple later in the night. pal asked a "lOgical questiOn". i'm prObably slOw, Or the simple fact is that maths had NEVER been a fOrte Of mine. i can blame it On fatigue tOO. yeah. the questiOn's suppOsed tO have sOmething tO dO with a BODMAS theOry we learnt in primary schOOl maths. the term eluded me. BODMAS what? nO recOllectiOn whatsOever. did i learn that? did i? never mind. i'm an arts persOn. nOt maths. nOr science. maybe with the exceptiOn Of biO. i lOved it. explains my preOccupatiOn with medical bOOks/shOws... anyway, the lack Of cOnnectiOn with these fields may aid in explaining why i suck at pOOl/billiard. because... it's like having physics lessOns in vectOrs...

tO steer the cOurse Of this entry back tO bOOk reviews. i devOured twO bOOks Wårning Sigñs & Bliñded by Stephên White this week. nOt as well-knOwn as rOwling & peers, i knOw. he's churned Out a dOzen Of psychO-thrillers, serving justice tO his clinical psychOlOgist-turned-writer stance. White manages tO keep the anticipatiOn fueled alOng the way. unexpected twists thrOwing the reader harshly back tO square One. the main draw tO his nOvels. surprises. the same characters engaged in every bOOk tO create an atmOsphere Of familiarity. Bliñded is nO exceptiOn, thOugh White Overdid it a little. crammed in tOO many events. all in all, i didn't discard it fOr sOmething else midway.

dreåry

feeling kinda grOggy. sleep OverdOse i say. sheesh. nOthing eventful tO share ‘cept that some nOthing-better-tO-dO ITE bOy made a daring attempt tO capture an image Of me On his phone cam while On the bus, wed afternOOn. annOying. hOpe his effOrt was futile… damn him. argh!! whatever. the fOrces Of change have nOt made a difference in my miserable existence but dOubt i wOuld, by any chance, tO be the first tO get asphyxiated by bOredOm.

Ñerding?

this blOg Of mine is starting tO lOOk like a bOOk-review cOlumn... hmm. well, there's really nOthing much i can dO abOut it since all that i dO Of late is read. gOnna avOid baking this weekend after receiving cOmplaints frOm my sweetheart that he's putting On pOunds. dOesn't he realise hOw lucky he is? guys... *rOlls eyes*

<<第一次的亲密接触>> 蔡智恆

蔡智恆 <<第一次的亲密接触>> 叙述了一个甜美, 纯洁, 但短暂的网路爱情故事. 内容有趣, 爆笑, 而又伤感. 情绪彷佛坐了一趟云霄飞车一般, 有起有落, 有喜有悲, 有笑有泪. 在无边际的网路上找到可以互相欣赏的对象并不容易... 但找到了又不能长久...

"对陌生的兩个人而言,
网路有时只能缩短认识的时间而已,
未必能拉近彼此的距离."

a drastic change in reading habit On my part, but i must say that this is a great bOOk. a certain level Of chinese language prOficiency is necessary tO grasp the witty, pun-filled cOnversatiOns in the nOvel. & the script is in traditiOnal chinese characters. Ü. a challenge tO read, but definitely wOrth the effOrt. 蔡's style Of writing is smOOth & enjOyable, cOnstantly brOught smiles tO my face & activated the tear ducts tOwards the end. memOrable plOt. sweet sOrrOw...

Lifë Of Pi - Yånñ MartêL

anOther suppOsedly brilliant bOOk (wOn acclaim by clinching the 2002 Man Booker Prize). failed tO bOwl me Over. almOst gave up even befOre reaching the 1st quarter mark. uninteresting cOntent. gOt better thereafter. entertaining? yes. hOwever, it lacks the thrill & attentiOn-grabbing quality which fuels anticipatiOn. i guess MartêL's style Of writing just dOesn't wOrk fOr me. lOts Of zOOlOgical elements. fascinating tO read, but fOrgettable. 2 chunks frOm the fable which left the deepest impressiOns:

"I must say a wOrd abOut fear. It is life's Only true OppOnent. Only fear can defeat life. It is a clever, treacherOus adversary[...] It has nO decency, respects nO law Or cOventiOn, shOws nO mercy. It gOes fOr yOur weakest spOt, which it finds with unerring ease. It begins in yOur mind, always. One mOment yOu are feeling calm, self-pOssessed, happy. Then fear, disguised in the garb Of mild-mannered dOubt, slips intO yOur mind like a spy. DOubt meets disbelief and disbelief tries tO push it Out. But disbelief is a pOOrly armed fOOt sOldier. DOubt dOes away with it with little trOuble[...]"

"It's impOrtant in life tO cOnclude things prOperly. Only then can yOu let gO. Otherwise yOu are left with wOrds yOu shOuld have said but never did, and yOur heart is heavy with remOrse."

cOmmeñdabLe effOrt

BAKED A CAKE. in the wee hOurs Of saturday. yes i did. 4 hOurs in the humid kitchen. the prOduct wasn't what i envisiOned, but On the whOle it was Ok. decent-lOOking. edible. thank gOOdness i had enOugh ingredients tO wOrk with. 3 layers of spOnge cake were destrOyed in the attempt. Only managed tO set my mind at ease after the birthday girl & the rest tried the cake. i had One & a half slices. it was deliciOus. i'm nOt cOmparing it tO NYDC's cheesecakes Or anything On par... it's a cOmmendable 1st try. will pOst the pics Once i figure Out hOw tO.

påyiñg faRës

an abnOrmal sOund. a burning smell. the death Of a vehicle. that happened tO my hunk On tuesday. a tragedy. depressing. he has tO gO public. public transpOrt, that is. it isn't that bad. really. as cOmpared tO Our fellOw hOmO sapiens in dOwn under... Or sardine-packed transpOrtation in japan, india... nevertheless, Our cOmplaints never ceased. expensive fares ~ lOw frequency ~ nO air-cOn ~ dirty seats ~ & the list gOes On. i'm as guilty as anyOne else. i dO grumble/fume in my heart sOmetimes. efficiency: a part Of Our sOcialisatiOn. high standards have been set & we wOn't tOlerate anything but the best. such is Our life in the garden city. anyway, my hunk's a lucky guy. gOing public is nOt repulsive fOr me. i'd gladly gO the distance when the need arises... but we gOtta live withOut supper fOr nOw... a blessing in disguise fOr Our waistlines maybe

Thê AlchëmiSt - Paulô Coëhlo

being a fan Of psychOlOgical thrillers (crime/medical-related), i guess this nOvel serves as a refreshing change. it needed a little getting used tO thOugh. Thê AlchëmiSt is a bOOk bursting with Optimism. a simple fable based On simple truths. Coëhlo states that "simple things are the mOst valuable & Only wise peOple appreciate them". indeed. & fear Of failure seems tO be the greatest Obstacle tO happiness. many a times, the fear Of disappOintment awaiting leads us tO sacrifice fulfillment tO cOnfOrmity. there's knOwledge Of the greatness One can achieve but yet denies tO dO sO -- thus ends up living a life Of vOid. 2 thOught-prOvOking sentences:

"it's the pOssibility Of having a dream cOme true that makes life interesting"

"when each day is the same as the next, it's because peOple fail tO recOgnise the gOOd things that happen in their lives every day that the sun rises."

Omens, determinatiOn, cOurage, despair, hOpe, resilience, destiny... weaved intO santiagO's quest fOr treasure. gOld may be wOrth a great deal mOnetary-wise, but the greatest treasures in life has gOt tO be lOve, happiness, wisdOm, & hOpe. my subjective view: an inspiratiOnal piece Of fictiOn, thOugh it's impact hasn't been as prOfOund/life-changing as intended. but everyOne's entitled tO different interpretatiOns since we each grew up within certain sOcial cOntexts.

a nOvel definitely wOrth a read → MëmOirS Of A GeiShå by Arthùr GOldeñ.

sOLitudë

certain phases in life require tOugh decisiOns tO be made -- fOrgO One thing fOr the sake Of anOther. sOmetimes we are left with little/nO chOice. but when we dO cOme tO that cOnclusiOn, it had better been wOrth the sacrifices. feeling kinda dOwn… stuck at the crOssrOads Once again. bOred. LöS+. peOple get sO engaged in their jObs/studies. me?¿ nO jOb tO fret abOut Or be respOnsible fOr. nO assignments tO rush. nO deadlines tO meet. absOlutely nOthing. just barely kept Occupied with baking… lame tv prOgrammes… keeping my hunk cOmpany. nOt being a sOlitary kind Of persOn dOesn’t help either. i prObably need a gOOd bOOk tO lOse myself in. dOne baking fOr tOnite. shall seek sOlace in my rOOm nOw. away frOm the fat-frOm-MY-blOOd mOzzie. damn IT.

rëSiLieñCe åfter dëvàStatiOn...

pity. the arOma was right but texture far frOm ideal. due tO Overwhelming requests & sO as nOt tO disappOint, i've bOunced back tO cOnduct yet anOther "chemistry lessOn". much is at stake. expensive bitter-sweet Hersey's chOcOlate chips. it better turn Out right this time.

LittLê wOmañ... dOmëStiCity iS fiñe...

despite being a partial-feminist and a prOud wOman Of the 21st century... i dO embrace sOme fOrms Of dOmesticity. it dOesn't mean i aspire tO be a full-time hOme-maker. hOwever, i dO derive pleasure frOm baking. it's like having chemistry lessOns. exciting huh? there's always the risks Of breaking stuff and causing explOsiOns Of sOme sOrts. nO such thing has happened as yet.

i wOn't be a self-cOnfessed prO at mixing flOur with eggs... yada yada. i dOn't even knOw the difference between the wide array Of flOurs (if yOu dOn't knOw, there's cOrn/self-raising/cake/tapiOca/pOtatO/plain flOur!?¿) and fats ( shOrtening/lard/butter/oil/margarine!?¿)... yes. that's why baking is an art. One wrOng ingredient in the fOrmula → pOssibly disastrOus results = unfit fOr human cOnsumptiOn. thOugh i enjOy my "chemistry lessOns" in my kitchen i wOuld Only cOnduct them with a purpOse in mind. i bake fOr the lucky few. the pOwer Of lOve fOr clOse friends & my hunkaliciOus partner.

mmmm... i can smell the arOma diffusing Out Of the tOaster nOw. yes. tOaster. i dOn't have an Oven. Oh well. it dOes limit the stuff i can churn Out but i can still dO wOnders like my saliva-inducing chOcOlate fudge brOwnies. my hunk & his adOrable sisters can vOuch fOr that. alrighty. gOtta gO check On my brOwnies. shOuld stOp bakin' at such unearthly hOurs as well.

digëStiVe SystêM MåLfuñctiOn

what a day... my mini ba chang ended up splattered arOund the wash basin @ 5:12pm. that's sO NOT gastrOnomic. that's catastrOphic. what a waste. a recap Of the evening's happening is sO nOt necessary... the sensatiOn Of the stOmach muscles cOntracting... threatening tO expel my deliciOus lunch. darn. a battle LöS+ On my part. prObably gOtta refrain frOm ingesting anOther nOnya dumpling fOr a shOrt while. it's nOt an experience yOu wanna relive. definitely. affirmative. Oh well... need tO fill up my stOmach nOw. dinner has lOng been digested. what nOw? cereals? chOcOlate? crackers? bread?

LöS+ iñ yOur eYêS...

I get LöS+, in your eyes
And I feel my spirits rise
And soar like the wind
Is it love that I am in?

I get weak in a glance
Isn't this what's called romance?
And now I know
'Cause when I'm lost I can't let go

I don't mind not knowing what I'm headed for
You can take me to the skies
It's like being LöS+ in heaven
When I'm LöS+ in your eyes

I just fell, don't know why
Something's there we can't deny
And when I first knew
Was when I first looked at you

And if I can't find my way
If salvation seems worlds away
Oh, I'll be found
When I am LöS+ in your eyes

Lethårgy rêViSited

the lack Of uninterrupted sleep has taken its tOll... rOused frOm my far-frOm-deep slumber, the sOunds Of drilling. dammit. new neighbOurs. HDB living dOwn here isn't all that fun. dreams Of experiencing the suburban lifestyle has always been hidden sOmewhere in the deep trenches Of my grey matter. huge gardens. cute neighbOurs. hallOween parties. chilling On the pOrch/swing... a tree-hOuse! well THAT'S my ultimate fantasy. it's way cOOl... Of cOurse life wOuld never be as perfect as we desire... but what's the harm in immersing Ourselves in Our fantasies Once in a while? wOuld prObably dO Our OverwOrked hearts sOme gOOd.

Ok. it's kind Of a cheap thrill... there was One WHOLE egg in my small bOwl Of BAN MIAN @ lunch yesterday. funny seeing that gOOey thing with half-cOOked yOlk bObbing in the sOup...